Author: Whimcycle
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Breaking and Eggs
A City of Heroes Whimcycle Story
By Whimcycle
A cold wind stirred the ashes that were once a storefront in Skyway. Whimcycle surveyed the remains of yet another Tsoo firebombing along with one of his contacts, Kong Bao. Amid the burned timbers and broken, melted glass knelt an old man. His clothes were covered with soot and burn holes. The man’s face showed traces of tears. Whimcycle’s eyes were drawn to the man, as he seemed to be laughing. According to Bao, the man’s entire family died in the explosion and ensuing fire.
Entering the destroyed shop, Whimcycle motioned to Bao to follow him. Kong hesitated for a moment then picked a path to Whimcycle’s side. “Do you know why he is laughing?” Whimcycle asked Bao.
Boa looked at the man with pity and said, “I can hazard a guess, but it is better to be sure.”
Kong bowed to the man and spoke a few quiet words of Chinese. The shop owner stopped laughing for a moment, and stood. He bowed to Bao and Whimcycle. He replied in English, “I laugh because I have no more tears to shed, but the pains remain.” With that, he bowed again and left the still smoldering remains of his home and livelihood.
Leaving the ruins themselves, the pair walked back to the spot in the parking lot where the two usually met. Bao looked at Whimcycle and said, “This was the third bombing this week. My people tell me that Silver Song is the one behind them. He has been raising the amount of ‘Protection’ money on the local business, bombing the ones that won’t or can’t pay the increases. He and his thugs have to be stopped Whimcycle! I have a lead that he might be using an old warehouse in Kings Row to make the firebombs. Will you take a look there?”
Whimcycle looked back at the shop. A sign leaning in what was once a window had managed to avoid the fire said, One Dozen Eggs $2.99. The right corner of Whimcycle lips twitched. They tend to do that when he considered his next course of action. Which is one reason why Whimcycle was a hero, and not a member of the World Poker Tour. ‘Good eggs, bad eggs you have to crack them all to make an omelet.’ Pondered Whimcycle.
Back in Hero training, one of the more interesting bits of training was the forced fasting. They would cut off meals for a day or longer. You learn to hide crackers packages and whatnot or go hungry. It was after a two-day fast that the group of recruits was brought to a kitchen outfitted with a cooking station for each of the eighty-seven trainees. A small box contained butter, mushrooms, green and red peppers, ham, cheese and yes, three eggs. Having been warned not to sample, the recruits stood at their stations awaiting word from HI Sumner what further indignities they would have to endure before getting a meal.
Sumner’s voice filled the cooking hall, “You girls look a mite peckish! Now, your mission today is to make yourself an OMELET, using only what you find in this room.” A loud mumble and a few muted cheers erupted. “Quiet!” He yelled over the hubbub. “Now, before you girls enter your Susie Home Maker mode, in making your omelet, you are NOT, I repeat NOT allowed to crack any eggs.” A stunned silence met the smirk on the HI’s face. “That’s right, you cannot crack, puncture, poke a hole into or otherwise damage the white ova in the boxes in front of you. You have one hour to make your omelets or go without until dinner tonight, that is all.”
HI Sumner stomped out of the kitchen; the door slamming behind him went unheard in the uproar that erupted. The three Assistant HI were barraged with protests that they ignored with smiles on their faces.
Hearthstone, Whimcycle, Flint Fist and Polestar stood next to their cooking stations, ignoring the clamor of their fellow trainees.
Polestar looked to the others and implored, “They wouldn’t give us this stuff if we couldn’t find someway to make an omelet, would they?
“Actually, I’ve come to believe that we have fallen in with fiends from hell.” Flint Fist declared in his rich Texas accent. The Tanker slammed his fist on the counter, causing it to rattle the entire length of the kitchen.
Hearthstone looked mournfully into the box of ingredients on the counter before him. “Fiends indeed. They put the flesh of an unclean creature before me, then tell me to cook it! Men do not COOK!”
Whimcycle pursed his lips and then said, “If they want to eat, they do. You mean to tell me you never had to rustle up your own grub before?”
Hearthstone shook his head. Flint Fist said, “Where I come from, we are partial to that unclean meat. I’ll trade you my cheese for that ham.” That brought a smile to the Fire Blaster’s face. They quickly exchanged bowls.
Polestar looked at the burner before him and stated, “I never cooked an omelet before.”
“Ah, omelets are easy.” Flint Fist claimed. “Ya go down to the diner and order one, ten minutes later, poof an omelet.”
The rest of the cadets had turned from complaining to the assistant HI’s to the matter at hand. Some tried to use their powers to remove the contents of the eggs, which usually resulted in a bad ending for the egg they tested on and a laugh from those watching.
Whimcycle cast his eyes about the room, noting everything he saw. His eyes rested on three large refrigerators along the wall. The right corner of his mouth twitched and he turned to the nearest AHI and asked, “Instructor Argent, may I get two clarifications from you?”
The large Tanker faced Whimcycle and said, “Clarify away, Cadet Whimcycle.”
“I did hear Instructor Sumner state that we were to make use of ANYTHING in the room to accomplish our task?” Whimcycle inquired.
AHI Argent looked about and responded, “I do believe that is what HI Sumner stated, though I think he mention that you had a time limit, and I think you are down to forty-three minutes. Oh, and don’t break any eggs in your box.”
“I wouldn’t dream of doing anything of the sort, Instructor Argent.” Said Whimcycle in a decorous tone. “However my second point is that several of my companions have never made an omelet before and I would like to show them how to sauté their ingredients.”
The ATI smiled and said, “By all means do so.” The ATI then yelled, “Listen up, Cadet Whimcycle is going to demonstrate how to sauté your veggies.”
Instantly, every eye in the room locked on Whimcycle. ‘Yeah, I’ve gotta learn to stop volunteering.’ He thought.
“The first thing were are going to do is slice the mushrooms.” Whimcycle called out. “Take a fork and stick a mushroom on it like so. Don’t jam it on so you can’t see the tines, you are going to use them as a guide for slicing.”
Once everyone had their mushroom on a fork, Whimcycle continued, “Using the fork, hold the mushroom to the cutting board. Take the paring knife,” which he held in the air, “and slice nice even slices of the mushroom. Do that for all the mushrooms.”
It took twenty minutes and several green healing glows to repair cut fingers, but the veggies were chopped. “Now take your omelet pan in your left hand and turn the burner knob up to the halfway mark.” Whimcycle instructed. “Once the burner is going, place the pan over it.”
Sleetstorm called out from across the room, “Couldn’t we have started the burners with the pans on them?”
“Yeah you could, if you were absolutely sure they would light, I never take the chance they won’t.” Declared Whimcycle.
“As the pan heats, wet your fingers and flick drops of water onto the pan. When the water dances across the pan, we are read to sauté the vegetables.” Whim ran some water over his fingers in the sink and flicked them at the pan. The water hissed and skittered until it evaporated.
As more of the pans displayed sizzling water Whimcycle called out, “Now take a dab of butter and swirl it about coating the pan. Use the knife to do it, or whip it around the pan like this.” He took the pan in his left hand and whipped it around in a tight circle. The butter skidded around the pan, melting as it went. “Grab the vegetables and toss them into the pan. Use your spatula to keep them from sticking. See how the mushrooms and peppers are going soft?”
“Soft and flat like my stomach!” Declared Torchbearer. “The smell is driving me crazy and we are not closer to making an omelet than we were 30 minutes ago!”
Whimcycle grinned, “I think you are much closer than you give yourself credit for. Dump the vegetables out of the pan and get ready to make your breakfast.”
Whimcycle strode past ATI Argent and open the first refrigerator. Inside were small metal bowls with three egg yolks each. He pulled one out and showed it to the others. “Form a line and come get your eggs.” He announced. There was quite a hubbub as cadets jockeyed to get to the refrigerators. The ATI restored order and help pass out the bowls.
Once everyone had their bowls, Whimcycle continued, “Unless you know how, watch what I do, then try it. Take your whisk and break the egg yokes, then stir them until they start getting frothy. Put a little more butter in the pan and pour the eggs in and swirl until the pan is coated in eggs. Then wait. Once the eggs have thicken, but are still moist on top, put in your fillings, the vegetables, ham, cheese etc.”
Displaying a dab hand, Whimcycle placed the contents of the bowls and the sauté vegetables in a thick column on the cooking eggs. A few other cadets were following his example while the rest watched some practicing his motions. “Now comes the hard part.” Whimcycle intoned almost to himself. “Using your spatula, flip about one third of the eggs mass over the filling and then fold the other third over it.” He deftly slid his spatula under the eggs and folded the eggs as he described.
“All that is left is to flipped the omelet a few times to heat the contents and then plop it onto your plate, ready for the eating!” Whimcycle declared with the hint of a satisfied smile showing on this face. Which soon fled, as he was press into service help thirty or more of his fellow cadets get their omelet done before the one-hour deadline was up.
The door to the kitchen banged open and HI Sumner stomped into the room yelling, “Your time is up, anyone without an omelet a plate in front of them step back to the wall.” No one moved from his position.
“So, you are trying to tell me that you ALL made an omelet without using the eggs in your boxes? IS that what I am to understand ladies?” The instructor’s voice was incredulous.
Torchbearer called out, “Instructor Sumner, we didn’t use our eggs, we used the ones Whimcycle found in the refrigerators over there.”
HI Sumner’s head snapped around to glare at Whimcycle and he slowly turned to look at the rest of the cadets with a look of destine. “You so called heroes purloined someone else’s breakfast just so you could make yourselves a meal. I can’t believe it, I just can’t believe it!” The happy looks on some of the cadets faces scurried away under this criticism. Whimcycle smiled broadly. He was itching to say something, but decided to let HI Sumner play his game.
“Cadet Whimcycle, who told you to procure the eggs out of the refrigerators?” Asked HI Sumner his voice tinged with scorn.
Whim answered levelly, “That would have been yourself Instructor Sumner.”
The HI stomped up to Whimcycle and placed his face next to Whim’s and catechized, “Are you saying that an hour ago I stood here and told you to go to those refrigerators and take the eggs out of them.”
Whimcycle was nonplus by this question. “An hour ago, you said, “Your mission today is to make yourself an omelet, using only what you find in this room. The refrigerators and their contents are in this room. Since we could not use the eggs in the boxes, I chose to think outside the boxes and into the iceboxes.”
HI Sumner spun about and strode pass the other cadets his prosthesis clicking as he went. Moving back to the center of the kitchen he called out, “When and if you get out and become a hero, you may have to kick in doors, steal computer disks, browbeat a suspect in order to bring the bad guys to justice ladies. You may be given impossible tasks by your contacts or superiors. Examine everything, don’t be afraid to experiment even if things break.” He pointed to some shattered eggs on the tables. “The answer maybe behind you, instead of in front of you. Ten minutes to eat your eggs and then I want this room policed up. I want it to SHINE ladies!”
“Whimcycle?” Questioned Bao. “Will you take the job?”
The twitch of Whim’s lips spread into a smile. “Sure, Kong. It is time to crack a few heads and make a Tsoo omelet.”
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