Video13
Posts: 1
Joined: 03/22/2007
Credibility: 25 pts
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*Buzzzzzz-Buzzzzzzzz*
"Hey! Waaaaaaake up!!" her alarm shouted. She'd gotten it because it was the only thing that could wake her up, someone yelling at her first thing in the morning.
"You want to flip burgers the rest of your life!" it continued to clatter. Actually, that didn't sound like a bad career choice after the past few days. Yes, serving fried fast food to a pack of frenzied mutants may seem dangerous, but could it really be worse than thwarting that invasion of Sentient Alien tea cups that thought they were deities last week?
She stretched her arms wide as she sat up on her steel bed. Her sleep had been mostly uninterrupted, but then it's hard to be interrupted when you only get three hours of sleep in the first place. Fighting the urge to go back to sleep, she slid out of bed and into the bathroom.
“Why does the morning always have to come so early?” she griped to herself, “And, why don't villains ever look like they haven't had a decent nights rest in weeks?"
She trudged her way into the bathroom, her self indulgent complaining continued “They're the one's keeping the insane hours in the first place, supply and demand merely dictates my hours.”
"Yawn" ushered from her mouth as she stretched out her arms, her tail finally able to stretch too.
"Eeeeeek! Dang it, not again...” She sighed as she reached around and pull the pillow off her tail-barb. The third time this week that she’d impaled it in her sleep. She wished this was covered by her insurance policy. The thought occurred to her that she really needed to check into alternative insurance policies, but ever since that accident with the car when she was drunk, she was finding it hard to get an insurance agency to cover her.
“Why did I ever have to register my gravity control?” she mumbled, “Anyone else would have been believed when they said their car was hit by a tree thrown by a giant demon from another planet, intent on ransacking a coffee diner. But no, it's like a stigma, you control gravity and yer a menace to vehicular transportation. Like I'm a disease or like Captain Leprosy, how come people still talk to him? Now, I have to walk everywhere.”
"sigh" she grumbled at the chaos in her life as she picked up the brush, her robotic fingers tightening around the already bent metal handle of the brush, crushing it a little more. She breathed in deeply and exhaled her frustration. She'd been wearing these for a while now, and still couldn't quiet get the hang of it. The devastation caused by her unleashed powers when not wearing them though gave her cause to keep them on at all times. Yet more thoughts of her misery swept over her.
Perhaps it was the exhaustion; perhaps it was the chaos, or just the lack of sleep. Either way, she was tired these days. Even back home she could at least get twelve hours of sleep per day, the fuss and muss of this place was driving her up the wall.
She combed her hair, straightening and tugging, yanking and twisting it until her pony-tails were back. She always liked having pony tails, something about them made her feel like she had horns, even if they were upside down. She’d always wanted to have horns. She thought they looked neat. She paused a moment and made a grimacing expression with her eyes, realizing with this metal face mask on she couldn’t even look scary. She tapped on the metal frame of her breathing mask, sighing in disappointment again.
“Like a guys ever going to want a girl he can’t kiss…” she mopped and headed back into the bedroom.
She pulled her thong up and put her top straps on. Posing in the mirror she once more let out a whimper. Her height made her barely as tall as a twelve or thirteen year old girl. Her skin had a near acidic nature it seemed, when it came to cloth made in this Universe; they dissolved pretty quickly. She shuddered at the thought of that incident, how embarrassed she was at that bar when it happened the first time. Back home, her outfit was almost like a uniform, everyone wore virtually the same thing, here it made her appear more like a teenage porn star. Everyone always seemed to stop and stare at her, she’d caused over 16 car accidents alone yesterday from driver’s being distracted while she was trying to stop a mugging or a purse snatcher.
The thought of her first meeting with the Police Chef ran through her mind. She’d nearly been sent to prison for being a flesh peddler. She couldn’t understand what all the fuss was.
She’d been sent here on lone to this Universe; to repent for her Sin’s was the official paper work back home. She’d been given the option of this or cleaning out the janitorial closest in the Abyss. She’d heard rumors of the nightmarish realm those closets incurred and wanted no part of them. Ironically, she was coming to realize she maybe hadn’t made the correct choice. The thought had recently occurred to her in the past week that the Abyssal Lords had created the rumors about the Janitorial closets just to force people to choose to come to this world, because it was far more dangerous and evil.
When she pulled out the glowing insignia of fire, the police chief at least took pause before arresting her. Though it wasn’t until he tried to cuff her and she threatened to place a gravitational singularity distortion in his lap that he decided to take her more serious. At the time it hadn’t occurred to her why this caused him so much concern. It was the first place she thought of as it was eye level to her because of her height. Back home her Abyssal Lords generally thought of that as a pleasant experience so she was some what shocked when her attempt at bribery had been taken as a threat.
Her first few days on this world were equally as confusing. Men would try to pick her up with lines that she thought even the dead wouldn’t have been caught alive using, and when she offered to generate a black hole in their laps, they would run screaming in panic, or begin sweating and begging for her forgiveness for how rude they had been. She lowered her head once more, even more disgruntled with how alien she felt here.
*Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzing!* her left arm vibrated uncontrollably as a little gem lit up. She pressed the button upon it causing the holographic display to appear above it.
“YOU’VE GOT MAIL!” the loud voice bellowed from her mechanical gauntlet. She’d forgotten to turn down the volume after listening to the Hard Rock music on the radio receiver built into it. She tried to cover the speaker as she heard the pounding on the wall.
“Shaddup in there! We don’t care if you have mail!!” said a voice through the wall.
Her neighbors were much more pleasant to her when she was giving them beer she’d noticed. But that was expensive and she hadn’t really found a job where she could dress as she had to. So far the only job she’d managed to get was at a seedy strip club where she got to play on a stage while people handed her money. This seemed a novel idea to her and she often wondered if the Abyssal Lords would be interested in the idea. Perhaps she could repent her sins in this fashion there. She’d even sat down one night to work out an awarded point system for how much each sin was worth in relation to their cause. She had gotten the impression they weren’t interested when she’d finally worked it all out and sat marveling at her 17,234,214 page booklet covering each and every sin in relation to its point value when a giant black spear shot down through the upper 15 floors of her apartment complex and impaled the book, incinerating it instantly. She suspected it wasn’t an accident caused by some random fight on the roof since it had ample momentum, but stopped exactly on her desk. Some times she hated being in tune with kinetic energy, it made it hard for her to lie to herself about these things.
She tapped the holographic display email icon. A page guaranteeing a phenomenal 25% increase in the length of her tail popped up. She moved her hand over the delete button, then stopped and looked back at her own tail. She’d always liked her tail, “why would they say I need to increase its length?” she thought. She thought a moment, wondering if maybe there was something indeed wrong with her tail. She pondered this, becoming overly sensitive to the length of her tail and wondered how it compared to other peoples tails. She’d always considered it was long enough, even flexible enough.
“Hmmmm...” she muttered and pressed the save button on this email. She decided she may need to come back to that later. Another window popped up offering a little blue pill that would increase endurance and keep you going strong all night long. She’d heard rumors about this universe and the fact that people tuckered out easily. Working at the strip club she’d often heard about something called Kiagra, and now the marketing company had created an off-shoot to help Hero’s and Villains increase the staying power of their powers. A notice flashed at the bottom of the window, she clicked it to see what that was about.
“We at Kiagra Incorporated would like to say,” a little media file popped up and began talking to her. She hadn’t really expected that, “that we do not condone supplying our “Medical Supplements” to those who would be classified as “Villains”. However, we must also acknowledge that these alleged “Villains” are just like us. They are humans, mutants, Alien invaders from a far off Galaxy, demonic entities and Divine avatar, etc... what have you. They have the same rights and privileges to our “Medical Supplements” as any other in this world does, as such we will not refrain from selling to these individuals merely because society has placed a stigmatic title upon them and called them ruffians. We were all that little fat boy in school who got beat up by the cool people once, and as such we will…” she clicked the off button.
“My Lord, their PR department is good…wonder if I could hire them,” she thought for a moment.
The next window popped up, “Hey there…” said the title. She skimmed through the email. She paused in contemplation. According to her email, there was someone who had read her online profile and wanted to get to know her better. This confused her for she didn’t know she had an online profile. She opened the link. She closed the link.
“Oh My Lord!! Can they really do that with a Hippo?!” the image, now burned into her mind, made her shiver in disgust. She pressed delete.
“Urgent News” said the next email. She opened it and skimmed through it.
“Wow” she laughed, “I got a real email even!”
She continued to read, a look of shock came over her as she read the grizzly details. One of her contacts sent her information about an invasion rumor. It seemed that there have been sightings of Extra Dimensional, Alien Mutant Wombats invading certain parts of the town. He wanted her to investigate immediately. She clicked the map link as an over head display of the city popped up with a little dancing leprechaun, who frolicked and created a little pot of gold, indicating her destination. She often wondered if her contact was as sane as he seemed in person.
She climbed out onto the window seal and leapt down the 20 floors to the road. As she neared the ground she created a gravity distortion above her head to slow her decent, landing gracefully in the middle of the road. A moment later she was back flipping up and to the curb as she barely avoided being hit by a truck. She growled at the truck as the bed of the truck crushed and conformed into a ball, bringing the vehicle to a dead stop. She looked down and realized she was still generating the Gravity Distortion. She ducked around the corner so no one could tag her as a suspect.
She climbed the walls and ran across the rooftops to her destination, leaping from one fire escape to the next roof as she hopped and flipped over air conditioning pipes and concrete fire places. She arrived at the warehouse her contact indicated was the staging place for this invasion. She leapt across the ledges, slipping on a roof tile as she fell to the ground in front of the door. As she stood up, she noticed a man standing there. He was clad in white and blue. She hopped onto her feet. She pulled out a newspaper from her gauntlet’s storage compartment.
“Lovely weather,” she said trying to pretend she hadn’t just fallen on her rear. “Newspaper says we’re due for a storm soon…”
The man tried not to laugh and went along with her Façade. He introduced himself as Ascendant Prime, a hero in the employ of a group of Super Buddies known as “The Alliance of” something. She’d missed what he said trying to conceal the fact her bottom hurt really bad right now. She was glad he couldn’t see her mouth; her lower lip was quivering from the stinging pain. She plugged his name into her gauntlet’s note pad feature, she was terrible with names but allies are always a welcome thing. He and a friend of his were off to thwart some crime boss somewhere. She waved goodbye as they ran off and she tried to stealth-fully enter the warehouse.
Thirty minutes later she dove out of a window. She was covered in purple glowing blood and lime-green fur, huffing angrily as her eyes lit up brightly behind her sun glasses. The entire building shook and creaked as space began to ripple around the building. Moments later the entire building fell in on itself with a gut wrenching “squeak” from the creatures inside as they were condensed with the building into a marble sized ball.
Her chest heaved in and out as she panted to regain her composure and calm down. She placed her protective gauntlets back over her hands so that her power could once again be restrained. She’d always found it hard to control her power, so she had to wear the gauntlet’s to prevent this sort of damage. She tapped the Storage compartment on the left gauntlet and pulled out the plans she’d reclaimed from the invading wombat army.
“I can’t believe they intended to animate potato chips and use them as shock troops against humanity,” her contact gasped in shock as he read the invasion plans. “You say they’re no longer a threat?”
“Um… not a threat anymore...” she tried to look innocent, rotating a marble sized ball in her fingers.
“And the machines they were using to enter this universe?” said the contact.
“Gone…yep, that’s all gone too…” she continued to rotate the ball.
“Amazing! Simply amazing work!” he handed her a plastic debit card. “For services rendered! I’ll let you know when the next job comes up. For now… why not get some new threads?”
She groaned in displeasure as she watched his eyes move up and down her body. But, he did pay her, so she could once again pay her bills. She thought a moment about how many points of repentance halting an invasion of Extra Dimensional, Alien Mutant Wombats intent on animating potato chips to wipe out humanity would have been worth on her point system. She pulled out an envelope and headed down the street.
“Next stop, the post office so I can mail in my rent check…” she sighed deeply again as she ran off down the street.
***THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED***
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| 03/22/07 07:14 |
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sportgenius
Posts: 990
Joined: 07/26/2005
Credibility: 2355 pts
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hey welcome to the site. I didnt have time to read that, gotta head to class, but it looked like a story. re-submit it as an article for some credibility.
(Another awesome signature made by DeathFetish)
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There once was a genius with razors
With claws, he was a trail-blazer
He hit level 50
I thought that was nifty
So I called to say "Gratz!" on my Razr
--- Crookwood
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| 03/22/07 09:47 |
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